Health

The emotional swings that come with directing a feature film would be unbearable to most. The only thing that has gotten me this far is my insanity and addictive personality.

The highs and lows are quite extreme. One moment I'm on top of the world, content as can be, then the next moment I'm curled up on the floor in the fetal position wishing I never had a dream at all.

When it comes down to it, this is what happens when you truly care about something with all your heart. Similar swings happen when you're in love with somebody. Probably one of the reasons why I'm afraid of ever falling in love again.

I suppose I'm a bit of a sadist and a masochist but I would much rather hurt myself willingly than let somebody else hurt me unknowingly.

Why have I written this post? Because I'm obviously insane. But I actually feel good. I've started polishing up a rough cut of quite a few scenes and I see the potential that's in the hard work that I've put forth. My vision will come to fruition.

-Ryan.